Acceptance Speech

Thank you, mother.

Thank you, father.

It didn’t work out for you two, but…

I’m here!

Thank you certainty, for your uncertainty.

I am not invincible- I’ve broken many things.

Thank you childhood

And adolescence

Without you I could not be the age I am today.

Thank you… love, for a broken heart

And everything I am because of it.

Thank you, the super-ego…

Thank you friends,

Thank you enemies

Thank you, those watching closely, but never quite see.

Thank you bravery-

I’m sorry fear.

Thank you…

Food,

Water,

Clothes

Morals.

Thank you, my bed!

Thank you, the living!

And for providing this space for me-us: the dead.

Phrases

“Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down

Never gonna dessert you”

I would suggest that we just take it day-to-day…

Why do people say these things?

These things seem to me false predictions of a future in love.

Whether it be said in a song, a poem, movie or an essay-

It doesn’t much translate in reality, when we’re face-to-face.

“I’d do anything, just to hold you in my arms

Anything to make you laugh”

The moment you have that someone, the thrill of the chase is gone.

Lack of effort is augmented and this makes your lover do anything but laugh.

“I will always love you…”

But, we cannot be together.

Proximity is an issue, and our work schedules don’t quite mesh.

“Love is stronger than pride”

Whose?

Certainly not mine.

“Have you Ever?”

Yes…I have, though sadly haven’t.

Because intimacy and vulnerability are parallel to trust and hurt- I’ll trust no one, I won’t be hurt.

“If you ask me to…”

I’ll have to think about it.

A beautiful mystery is the inception of dating.

Falling is easy-

The staying in love is arduous work.

“Talk to me”

But don’t tell me too much, a past, that we all have maybe upsetting.

I see people losing every day because they would rather stay together, for no reason but convenience and being alone is too uncomfortable.

“Love is blind”

Then take away Cupid’s bow and arrow!

“It’s better to have loved and lost…”

What some of us have lost we’ll never find again.

“We’re all poets when our heart is broken…”

I agree with that…

Help me understand what exactly all the cliched phrases mean

“A word, without action means nothing”

Again, I agree.

Are we doomed or destined to be caught in the cycle of love?

No one has an answer

And no ones asked the right question

“What I write, I write only for you”

“Promise you’ll never let go”

There are limits to the weight my arms can hold.

“I would walk 500 miles”

Why can’t we meet in the middle?

“Love is a battlefield”

Please, why must we fight?

“I’d take one million bullets for you”

How many would you take?

The only Mystery

Flowers refulgent 

And leaves are green as they are supposed to be. 

A dog barks when there’s danger or excitement, as it should. 

The tide carries on as the moon commands it so;

The sun cures the land- with reason…

Is man supposed to fall in love? 

Growing up, I assumed that one day working along side other pretty well educated individuals, like myself, there would be minimal to no drama at all in the work place.

I’ve gotten old– I’m getting older and I’ve realized: the politics, the nepotism, the gossip – the plain high school-like behavior doesn’t stop. 

Tell Me (Trust Me)

Tell me the worse nightmare you’ve had as a child 

Tell me a lie you’ve told and have gotten away with- so far. 

A regrettable sexual impulse.

You’re telling me you trust me 

Then spill your guts to me…

Tell me the first thought that comes to mind as you wake

What you think before you fall to sleep

Don’t leave a stone unturned, tell me everything. 

Do you feel comfortable– safe being who you are?

Have you fantasized, things deleterious: physically hurting someone?

What age were when you first touched yourself for the sensation of pleasure? 

What age were you when you shared your innocence? 

Have you broken someone’s heart

Are there apologies you’d like to speak to anyone? 

You say that you trust me, tell me what hides in your light, what you do in the dark… 

Tell me your all 

Your nothing    

The outs and ins of who you are. 

Trust me, 

Tell me. 

The Punch Line

Two men walk into a bar, The first man orders a scotch and soda. 

The second man remembers something he’d forgotten and it doubles him over with pain. 

He falls to the floor- shaking.

Then through the floor and into the Earth.  

He looks back up to the first man, but he doesn’t call out to him… 

They aren’t that close.

2,000 yrs (closer)

Seems like two thousand years I spent chasing something that is now a ghost.

I shouted til my lungs gave out

And cried until my eyes resembled blood.

What’s between the heartbreak and where I am now? 

Well, there was silence 

And reflection.

Smiling when I wanted to frown…

Closer- I thought I’d gotten. 

But, I’ve always had trouble reading depth.

It’s been what seems like two thousand years that have passed…

Chasing something, 

I caught that something

And it fought me until I set it free.

Two thousand year it seems has passed 

And I’d still rather live- alone with the being hurt by you than learn something new and it then hurting me.

If it is real

Today…. Well, today I met and touched someone who the term ‘incredible’ does not do justice.
I haven’t many words in this moment, because I am still unsure if it is real.